Downcasted! ):hais.
Today school was alright. Saw our semester2 results and i'm not quite satisfied with it. But what can i do except for accepting the fact about that and think of working harder next year? I'm always thinking of that but it just didn't work. Damn my brain la. Others so hardworking and born clever while me? Still the same old stupid girl! Fuck it okay. If i get top 80 for my EMS i will sure jump over the moon kay. No hope already. Can see from my ultra pathetic results -sigh-
Congrats to those who top for a particular subject and ZhiYao, who made history for getting an A1 in english. Congrats luh hur :D and
2e3'o8 made history! Cheerios. It sounds nicer than e1 e2 e4 anyway. And, that's really true, i'm not trying to be BHB :P thanks to him for that :)
Of course,
i love 2e3'o8! Rock on poeple. I hope for friends, not foe. But someone is making me think of her as foe. All her actions, speech. Let's go through the few more days together! And, all the best for EMS ranking.
2e3-ians, let's make history!:DAnyway, back to topic.
Visit to Science Centre today. The movie was showing when we reached so we need to watch th 11am one. And went to the NEWater place to walk around. Very creative, nice layout of everything and presentation haha :D last time i went was Pri5 i think :/
Went for a tour around the pace and proceeded to watch the canyon IMAX movie :) It was ultra cool can, looks so real and 3D. But the PAP kids were screaming all the way grrr. But i still enjoyed it, although it cause me to get dizzy :P It's real nice when you feel yourself being in the canoe and meeting all the obstacles, esp large waves. Haha.
And reached school @ 12.35! Chiong to eat, take bag and changed to ptkit.
Due to the rain, campcraft became drills training session and we can see the hard work and sweat we made together in a squad :P But we must thanks Vanessa, Vivien and Kelvin too. Throws out our questions and i understood most of them.
2.30+, changed into full uniform to prepare for my Corporal Test! :) Goodluck and pat on shoulder can be seen in our squad, cheering each other on. I'm nervous and excited about it. But not confidence! None of that, not a single bit of the word 'confidence' could be found inside my character at that point of time when the CI asked us this. Started with baton drills and moved on to footdrills, WOC?
Here, i''m like shocked when i knew it would be CI telling us to give commands instead of we, deciding it for ourselves and for our squad. And, i'm real disappointed with my squadmates. I don't know why i could put it that way, but seriously. Hais. I'm not blaming them but yeah ... (i don't know how to say it luh!) We were told to change back to ptkit and i could feel my heart sinking, bacause i knew it has ended, not completely. Just for TODAY. Dang it. I don't know when it will be our next one. I wish it's ASAP ): Please!
My weeks of looking forward to this corporal test,
My days of hard and extra trainings,
My sweats during the trainings,
My excited mind and nervous actions,
My prepared mind for this 'one and only day',
My believe in a passing it along with my squadmates.
When it just ended suddenly, really make me feel downcasted.
It's like everything is threw in to the drain, out of my brain.
This feeling of sadness, i know i can't express it and you guys can't feel it. Hais.
And it's a feeling of Sian Diao - ness. I really feel that NP is really ____ , because such things always happen to my squad. Unfair kay. Damn it larh.
I want to thank Vivien, Kelvin, XinHui and Vanessa for putting so much effort and time in us, but suddenly all these happened. Really
a big thankyou :)! Unexpected right? T.T
Fuck everything. I just want to rant them here.
bye! Sorry for the vulgarities people.
A real 'great' day today.
